Wednesday, September 30, 2009


Why do people feel the need to attack so vicously, with no regard to those they are hurting? Why is it that in our society people prefer to pick apart rather than build? Why is it more common to criticize than to compliment what others are doing? The answer is really quite simple, Fear. Fear can cause us to do really stupid things. But where does this fear stem from? We all work hard to do the things we consider to be right. Our whole lives can be identified by our beliefs and our passions. When we see someone doing something that is not what we believe, we feel the need to point out their wrong doings. In a weird way it reassures us that what we are doing, is correct. If led into a discussion, we might even get angry and rude when stating our position. Think how hard it would be to accept for ourselves that what we have invested so much time into, may actually not be right. The thought of that can make us defensive and cause us to lash out. When that uncomfortable feeling arises some of us have the skills to debate, while others can only fight the best way we know how. Don’t be mad at the boxer because he punches in a wrestling match that is the only way he knows to defend himself. The real key is to not try to justify your beliefs by attacking others. Let others do what it is that they believe in. If what they do bothers you so much, I suggest you ask yourself why? If they don’t live with you and it doesn’t affect you directly, then why the anger and the need to tear them down?
My grandfather use to say,” Yo lo que se , es que no se nada” (What I know, is that I know nothing)
Anger, hate and frustration came during the height of the Civil Rights movement, Why were they so angry? Because what they had believed in for so long was being attacked. It didn't matter that they were wrong.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

The Best Parent

People talk about all kinds of different parenting styles. They will use what they read in books, newspapers, maybe heard on Oprah or just learned from their own parents, to guide them. Some will laugh and gawk at the way others parent. This will come from their own internal doubts as to whether what they are doing is right. Even the professionals go back and forth about what the right answers are. Infants on their stomachs, on their sides, their back, and then back to the stomach, does anyone really know? There are hundreds of opinions on the best way to discipline your child, or what they need or don’t need medicinally, but again who really knows? I have seen success stories from people who grew up in the Bronx, with no money and the worst of schooling and failures from those who grew up with lots of money, with the best of schooling and from the finest part of town. Some of the greatest minds in our time come from families that one might call “broken”. So what is the answer?

The truth is that when it comes to techniques, there is not just one answer. Each and every case and individual is different. What works for one, may not work for another. However there is one thing that is universal and never has failed, love. Of course everyone loves their child but it is the unconditional devotion that one puts into that child that will make them the great people we want them to be. The dedication that you put into your parenting style will shine through and cover your child with love and a feeling of individuality and self confidence. The success stories from the Bronx, always have the single working mom, who did everything for that child. I am sure that mother had plenty of people telling her how crazy she was but she ignored them and kept going. She didn’t have anyone or anything to guide her but her love for her children and it guided her to be fully committed. Her children witnessed her sacrifices and dedication, gathered strength from it and were able to achieve great things. Don’t be concerned so much with the style or technique, dedication and love is what will raise your children well, just as neglect and anger will tear them down.

Imagine a balanced scale with dedication and love on one side and neglect and anger on the other. What does your scale look like? What do you want it to look like? What can you do today to make it look the way you want it to?

Monday, September 28, 2009


Consider Mark Twain’s famous quote,
"Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it."
 People will hurt us throughout our lives. Some will hurt us without even knowing, while others will purposely set out to cause us pain but it is what is at the root of their actions that is more telling, then the actions themselves. When we are infants our minds are pure and even fear does not exist. It is only as we grow and are influenced by outside forces that we begin to fear and create a belief system. Each and every one of us is influenced differently and these influences can shape us into who we are as adults. As adults, many of the things we do and say are only reflections of what we have been taught by life and by others. Sometimes, what we do and say can hurt the ones around us. Although there are those people who exist that maliciously set out to hurt others, for the most part that is not the case. Most of the time, we are only trying to protect ourselves and what we believe in and unfortunately, along the way others get hurt. It is much easier to forgive when you learn not to take things personally. When you realize that what was done was really not done to you, but at you. In other words, what was done was a direct result of who that person is, not so much because of who you are. Once you can fully understand that, true forgiveness is more obtainable. So some people might say, “Why do I have to forgive anyway?” Most of us see forgiving as giving something to the other person, a form of weakness or just giving in to our position. The truth is forgiveness is for us, not for them. It allows us to let things go. It allows us to keep living our lives without resentment and hate in us. The hidden bonus in forgiving others is that subconsciously it allows us to forgive ourselves recognizing the humanity that we share with those who we have forgiven.

Friday, September 25, 2009

You Don't Know Jack

Some of the people we learn the most from in our lives are not the ones that we will necessarily like the most. As the saying goes, “the truth hurts” and most of the time, those who deliver us the truth are not our favorite people. Although this story is a little long, it’s one of my favorites and drives home the point.

While in my early 20’s, I worked for a man named Jack Stewart (Greatest teacher). He was rarely one to praise and always pushed me for more. He called me into his office one day to send me on what he himself described as a waste of time. It was an important client that wanted to renegotiate their contract. They had never signed in the past but someone still had to go. As I left to meet with the client I remember Jack telling me that I would never get a new contract. His exact words were, “This client is a tire kicker, they’re not interested in buying.” I went to the meeting and was lucky enough to be in the right place at the right time. The client signed a new contract with me and I raced back to give Jack the good news. I entered his office and proudly placed the contract on his desk. He didn’t even bother to lift his head and recognize that I was in the room. “Hey Jack, do you see what’s on your desk”, I asked? Without looking up he responded, “Very nice.” To which I responded, “It’s signed, in case you didn’t notice”. “Yeah, I noticed” he said, as if it was expected. At this point I was completely frustrated with his lack of enthusiasm and appreciation for what I had accomplished. I went on a five minute tirade on how appreciative he should be, about the fact that I was able to accomplish what he himself had labeled, an impossible task. He finally looked up at me from what he was doing and calmly said, “That’s what I pay you for.” Of course that brought no comfort to me and now I was even more upset. I went on to explain to him that life is not all about money, people like to be praised for their efforts. I told him that people like a good pat on the back for their extra efforts. Suddenly the expression on his face changed and what I was saying seemed to have finally seeped in. He asked me to sit down, he leaned back, and yelled out “Susie, come into my office.” Susie was the company’s bookkeeper. My heart started racing with the thought of the raise he would be instructing Susie to give me. I knew Jack had finally come to his senses. Susie entered the office and Jack looked her dead in the eye and sarcastically said, “From now on Fridays, don’t give Alex a paycheck, he’s gonna come in here and I am going to give him a pat on the back instead.” (Feel free to laugh here, everyone does.)
Needless to say, I was, embarrassed and stormed out of the office. Later and I mean much later, I remember him telling me to make sure you ask for what you want in life. Don’t beat around the bush, don’t be sly or clever, be a straight shooter. “A straight shooter conserves bullets and always hits his target.” I hated him at times in my life but when I look back, he was by far my greatest teacher and friend.

You don’t know Jack but I’m sure you have met his family.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Don't Stop Believing

The one thing that keeps us going in our lives is hope. The hope that we will get all the things we want and are willing to work hard for. Along the way, we will be faced with obstacles and we will want to give up. Throughout our lives we will have those who say we can’t. Their words will create doubt and make us want to give in. Some will say our way is wrong and we may lose focus while trying to follow their path. There are those who will see our progress and try to distract us to their stagnation.
Use your compass to set your own course. Stay focused on what you know to be your way. This is an imperfect world that is forever changing and as a result, what we must do today, we might not do tomorrow. What is acceptable tomorrow is taboo today. Push forward and stay your course. Do what you know to be true to you. Don’t be swayed, misguided or pressured into conforming to what others think you should do or be. No matter how lonely or difficult you find your path to be, don’t stop believing in yourself and your ideas.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Good Mourning

Most people relate the word “mourning” with sadness, crying and the death of a loved one but we can mourn in many ways, about many things. We can mourn a friend who moves away, losing a job, our youth, and basically any dramatic change that occurs in our lives. What is it that seems to tear us apart, leave us feeling empty and in a state of reflection? The first and most obvious answer would be that we will miss what or who, we had become so familiar with. From that, one would also gather that we would  miss the way that situation or person made us feel. I really enjoy my daughters playing soccer, it has become part of my life. Every weekend we go to games and most of our “family vacations” are soccer tournaments. Will I mourn when the soccer comes to an end? Of course I will. It may not be the same type of mourning as if someone was to die but the characteristics of mourning will be there, sadness, and some time for reflection followed by a period of adjustment. So what do we do to protect ourselves from the inevitable losses that we will all have to endure throughout or lives? The answer is quite simply, nothing.  There is nothing you can do to change the inevitable. We will always have to deal with changes in our lives and the loss of loved ones. What we can do, is to embrace those things when they are staring us in the face. Love every minute of the “soccer” games in your life. Call our loved ones as much as possible and tell them what they mean to us. Find the time to spend with those who we care about the most and when your with them, don’t think about how you might change them but how you would never want to exchange them. There’s a song by Tim McGraw called “live like you were dying”, for today I suggest we change the words around to, “Live like they were dying”. It won’t eliminate the inevitable mourning but it will guarantee that you will never have regrets about the time you did spend with that person or part of your life.

Watch the video below:

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Happy Dog

A dog is known as man’s best friend. Anyone who has ever owned a dog, knows why.

  • Your dog doesn’t care what you look like or for that matter, what he/she looks like 
  • Your dog only wants to please you and thinks only of his/her bare necessities like food and water. 
  • Your dog doesn’t care what you do for a living or how much money you have. 
  • Your dog is always happy unless you are not. 
  • Your dog will always forgive you, no matter how mad you get or what you do. 
So what is it that makes an animal able to love us unconditionally?

Your dog has no ego.

Monday, September 21, 2009

Be Yourself

When we meet new people or groups, it can be very easy to pick up their mannerisms and ideas in a subconscious attempt to fit in. We can find ourselves agreeing to things that we normally wouldn’t have. We can find ourselves saying things that are not really us. It’s always difficult because you don’t want to come across as difficult but you don’t want to compromise who you are either. It can even be more difficult when you are outnumbered. The problem with not being yourself is that eventually the real you shows up. We can’t fight who we really are and cannot change the things about us that others don’t like. Despite any and every attempt we make to change reality, some will like us and others will dislike us. Imagine the level of frustration you can reach trying to please everyone and still having those who will disagree with you and dislike you. Trying to fit in is smart, changing who you are in an attempt to fit in, is a formula for disaster. “Oh yeah by the way”, some of us think you’re a great person and look up to you, and others of us think you’re not and don’t but the only opinion that really matters is what you think.

Friday, September 18, 2009

TURN HERE !!!!!!

Nothing is more frustrating than being driven by someone who in your mind, doesn’t know how to drive or for that matter where they are going. You sit uncomfortably in the seat next to them wanting to tell them the errors in their ways and how much faster, better or smatter your way is. The more you know or think you know about how to get to your destination, the more frustrating it can become. When you see them turn down a different street or head in a different direction, you have to do everything in your power to not burst out with a, “Where are you going”? In complete contrast, if you were on vacation in a location that is foreign to you, the cab driver could pretty much be driving in circles and you would sit in the back like a bobble head doll, smiling without a care In the world. As long as you got to your location in the time you were told it would take, you would be his happy little prisoner.

As we motor through our lives there are those who try to drive and those who understand their not the ones driving. If you spend your life trying to drive, you will be forever frustrated, constantly yelling out, where are you going”? We don’t really know why or where we are going but when we think we do it can make for a very frustrating ride. Life is a foreign country, sit back, relax and let the cabi do the driving. You’ll be shocked to see who was driving the cab in the end and amazed how well he knew where you were going.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

A Single Rose

Per request and as a follow up to "The Perfect Storm" here is "A Single Flower" (the perfect woman)
A single flower stands alone in fields of grassy weeds
She stands alone among them, in beauty and with grace
The common grow so rapidly, they do not share her needs
This single stem of quality, she strengthens at her pace
At times she bows with thirst, for lack of simple water
The common drink whatever is given and seem to grow with ease
She waits with pride for rain to come, this girl a roses daughter
For she knows the common food is not for her to seize.

When lonely, she will look at them and wonder what would be
She feels as though she’s all alone, she feels she’s not the same
The common gaze at her with envy, to see as she can see
They wish they could be flowers but this they cannot claim

The lifeless weeds now lying down, to form a sea of grass
When winter comes and all is bare, the weeds will be forgotten
Along the ground, she still stands out, this beauty of the past
For even when her time has gone, this flower will not be rotten

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Lead the Way

I hear so many of us instructing our kids on the lessons of life, particularly on how to be successful in life. I know that every one of us does this with the best of intentions. In sports we yell at them to run faster and try harder. In school we push them to be the best and not except anything mediocre. With friends, we want them to selectively choose those who “have good heads on their shoulders”. We want them to stay in shape and not eat so much junk food. We want them to be social and more open to trying new things (not just broccoli). The bottom line for most of us, we want to make sure that they don’t make some of the same mistakes we made. Unfortunately, in a lot of cases these are mistakes that we are still making today? When they are younger they abide to our wishes like good little soldiers but as they get older, they begin to notice our behavior and question it. They wonder why we settle for mediocrity. They ask why we don’t exercise anymore. They look at the friends we choose for company and question our choices. After a while, we begin to lose credibility with our own children. They won’t run up and tell us but they begin to question all these things we ask so adamantly from them. One of the interesting things you will find is that they are more likely to mimic behavior, than start new behavior that doesn’t coincide with their family’s interest.

If we teach our children that’s It’s never too late for them, than it would only be logical that it is never too late for us. Run faster, try harder, strive to be the best, don’t except anything mediocre, surround yourself with the right people, stay or get in shape, don’t eat so much junk food, don’t be close minded, try new things and most importantly remember what you would say to them, “you can be anything you want to be, if you just ....................”.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

The Friendly State

Whenever I go to visit my daughter in Alabama, there is always one thing that stands out, how friendly everyone there is. Almost everyone will say good morning as they walk by. If you find yourself in an elevator with others, they will strike up a conversation. If you are being served in a restaurant, the staff will go out of their way to make your experience a good one. Overall, people seem to be less angry and to not have that chip on their shoulder. So on my plane ride home, I got to wondering why. Well I am sure a part of it is learned behavior. We watch our parents and how they interact and then follow in their footsteps. I am sure part of it is habit. We are just so use to not doing it that it doesn’t occur to us anymore. Lastly, I think it has to do with a little bit of fear. Maybe we will say hi and they won’t. Maybe the other person will think we are goofy (something along those lines). I find it ironic that in Miami, we all kiss each other on the cheeks to say hello, (very personal) yet we barely mean it. You go to kiss someone in Alabama and they look at you like your crazy but when they shake your hand, they look you dead in the eyes, give you a smile and greet you like they mean it.
If we want this to change and I do, it needs to start with us. Make it a point today to say hi to people that you may have normally just passed by. Don’t purposely take the path of least resistance but seek out those around you and let them know you care about their lives. Let a car or two in front of you in traffic. Strike up a conversation with the person in line at Publix. It doesn’t matter how, who or when, just be the catalyst to making a change. You will find yourself smiling more and less apprehensive. If you take inventory at the end of the day, you will see that 99% of the reactions to you, were good ones and in fact, you will realize that the friendly state is a state of mind, not a physical location.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Our Little Kanye

I can never quite figure out why so many people insist on trying to create their happiness by attacking and criticizing others. I have said before that many of us do the things we do with a certain amount of uncertainty as to whether what we are doing is 100% correct. So in an attempt to convince ourselves, we attack what others are doing. Of course this never works. The only thing that comes out of this kind of behavior is more uncertainty and a negative energy that consumes our thoughts. You may think that pointing out others flaws or faults adds a positive spin on what you are doing but, in reality, it only creates more doubt and less happiness. A great example happened last night at the VMA’s. In an attempt to discredit Taylor Swift, Kanye West stood up and made a fool of himself while accomplishing the complete opposite of what he had set out to do. So you ask yourself, "Why does someone who has already reached the pinnacle of their industry feel the need to destroy a 19 year old girl's night that she herself has worked equally as hard for?"
It may come as a shocker but we all have that little Kanye inside of us. It’s that voice that comes out and says things that hurts others with no benefit to anyone. I see others criticizing his behavior but I wonder how many of those same people will do the same thing today, just on a different scale. How many of us will spend our days saying and doing hurtful things to others while leaving a path of destruction as we walk through our lives.
My father use to say, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, then don’t say anything at all.” By now you have heard me say, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, then find something nice to say.” Let people have their "Taylor Swift" moments. Whether you like their kind of music or not, whether you think they deserve it or not, whether you agree or disagree. Take the little Kanye in you and put him where he belongs. If not for everyone else, put him away for yourself. Whether you realize it or not, he is what brings you insecurity, shame, and most importantly, your little Kanye holds you back from growing as a person.

Friday, September 11, 2009

Will Power

When we decide to do something, the first thing that people talk about is your will power. Will power is not just limited to stopping certain behaviors, it can also be about creating new ones. Whether you’re trying to stop smoking or starting an exercise program, it will take a certain amount of will power. Read through the following definitions taken from the dictionary:

  • the use of the mind to make decisions about things
    the determination to do something
    a desire or inclination to do something
With the word “will” being a root of the word willing, take a look at the definition of willing:

  • ready to do something without being forced
    cooperative and enthusiastic
    offered or given by somebody readily and enthusiastically

Ok so what does all this mean to the person that wants to lose weight, start working out, quit smoking, etc…. It means that to be successful, it will have little to do with an internal strength, which is what most people associate will power with. Your “will power” like most things, will be based on good decision making and sound logic. It has nothing to do with being a stronger, better or more focused person, just a more realistic planner. It has everything to do with the six definitions written above. Go down the list of definitions as if they were questions and if you answer yes to all of them, then the odds of your success are great.

Am I using my mind to make this decision? (Or is it someone else’s mind or your heart)
Am I determined to do this? (Determined is not the same as wanting to do this)
Do I desire this (Sounds obvious, but on a scale from 1 to 10. If you could have this or a million dollars which would you pick? Ok, now readjust the desire scale because the million is a 10 and what are you doing to get that)
Am I being forced to do this? (by others)
Are you cooperative and enthusiastic (ready to follow the game plan and happy to do so)
Are you doing this readily and enthusiastically (create and enthusiastic atmosphere)

Wrapping it all up, the first thing you need to do is determine that this is something you really want to do and that it is not being created by outside forces. Once you decide you really want it, consider it done. In other words say thing like, "I don’t smoke anymore" not, "I am trying to quit smoking". Your language will speak highly of your true commitment. Now you need to create enthusiasm. If you were dieting, you might make a list of all the benefits you would receive from dieting and buy some health magazines. This will serve to help you stay focused and remember why you made the decision you made, in the first place. Lastly, reflect daily on the things you have been able to accomplish and the benefits you have received. Remember this has to be a decision of the mind, not the heart. Be willing and all things are possible.

"Man can do all things if they will"

Thursday, September 10, 2009

How old are you anyway?

Yesterday while jogging around my neighborhood, I remember thinking how easy and effortless running was in my 20’s. I started reflecting on my age. As I came down the home stretch, I ran pass a neighbor who I have known for years. He asked me how it was going, to which I sarcastically replied,” this old man is trying to stay in shape”. He asked me how old I was now and I told him 42, he smiled and said, “ I just turned 62, I ‘d trade for 42 any day of the week”. His words filled me like the fountain of youth.
When we are young, we look forward to being older. We see being older as being able to do more and having more respect from others. As we get older we wish we were younger because once again we see younger as being able to do more, even if it’s just physically and we might even feel less respected or counted on by others.
So what is the right age? What is the best age? The answer is simply, today’s age. Go out and do everything you ever wanted to do, when you thought about being today’s age. Enjoy all the benefits of being this age. Most importantly, don’t spend this year thinking of what age you wish you were or remembering how great some age in the past was. My guess is, that unless you lived the way I am describing, the years of the past were wasted thinking about other ages you wished you would have been.
Don’t forget, how old or how young you think can have an incredible impact on how old or young you feel and your everyday experience.
Interested in more? check out this article at the site below:

Wednesday, September 9, 2009



Being around someone who is passionate is an incredible experience. What that person is passionate about doesn’t even seem to matter because it’s more about the intense feeling and efforts that you see them putting in, that leaves you frozen in bewilderment. Steve Irwin, Racheal Ray, Lance Armstrong, Luciano Pavotratti, Michael Jackson and many others share not in what they do but in how passionate they are, about what they are doing. No matter how simple or complicated the task, when you see that person in action, you are consumed in the passion for what they are doing. Take what you do and be passionate about it. Don’t worry about what it is, as much as how you do it. Let’s face it, chasing lizards, baking cookies, riding bikes, singing songs and dancing are all very nice but you’re not curing cancer. It’s not what they do, it’s how they do it that makes the difference. So whether you’re a teacher, salesman, writer, executive, housewife, entrepreneur, or anything else, get into it. Do what you do with passion and you will leave your mark on the world.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

People are People

Let people be who they are. Don't try to change them. Let them have their own likes and dislikes. Don’t force your own beliefs on everyone around you. We tend to want people to like the things we like and share in our beliefs. I think it's because by others sharing our ideas, it validates our own. In reality, it is the people that oppose us that bring us to question our own beliefs and in the end make us grow. The people who have had the greatest impact on the world are usually those who have opposed the beliefs of the many. Christopher Columbus, Abraham Lincoln and Martin Luther King are just a few of the many examples that come to mind. I will bet that those being opposed felt uncomfortable, angry and frustrated with these ideas and the persistence of these three individuals when they were opposing them. I bet they sat around criticizing and wanting to put an end to what they believed to be nonsense or some form of betrayal. Although not on such a grand scale, we are opposed daily by others and their beliefs. We too become irritated and frustrated. Much of what we may hear or say, goes against what we were raised to believe in and it immediately raises our defenses. Everything you know and believe in, is a direct result of what you were told and the things that you have experienced as a child and adult but that alone will not make it true. Holding on to these ideas without having others question them would make us stagnant in our beliefs and allow little room for growth. I know it will sound crazy but we should welcome those with different beliefs, likes, dislikes wants and needs. Listen to what they have to say. See what kind of support they may have for their ideas. In the end, even if you don’t agree with them, agree that opposition makes us think out our positions and that can never be a bad thing.

“Having a mind that is open to everything and attached to nothing”,
Dr. Wayne Dyer

Friday, September 4, 2009

Are you Happy Now !!!

I hear people talking all the time about when happiness will come for them. I myself have uttered many of the same lines.
“I’ll be happy when I am making xxxx amount of money.”
“I’ll be happy when my child does, or is , this or that.”
“I’ll be happy when the weekend is here.”
"I'll be happy when ______________."
We spend our lives waiting for weekends, parties, salaries, football games, marriages, people, places and many other things, to determine our state of happiness. Some of these things will never come, so does that mean our happiness will never come? Most of these things will come differently than what we originally expected, does that mean our state of happiness will be different? Most importantly, if these things come and they come exactly the way we wanted, do we take the time to bask in our happiness, or do we just let that moment pass without notice, while we focus on the next thing that will bring us our happiness?

Happiness is now. Happiness is the process. Happiness is the state of anticipating the big game and the fun that goes with talking about it. Happiness is the planning of starting a new family. Happiness is the place in which we are and the salary we make. It’s the very life we live, each and every moment of every day. Most importantly happiness is a decision that you can make right now and substantiate it with the great people, places and things you have right now. Your state of happiness is a direct result of your perception to your situation. So if you continously set new expectations for new situations, it would only make sense that you will never reach a state of happiness.
Stop living for the future and live for the now. You will find happiness now, not in the future.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

College Life

Last month I dropped off my daughter at college, in Alabama. I know that she is growing not only as a student but as a woman. Although most of the time she is extremely happy and having a lot of fun, sometimes when we talk, I hear her struggling to do things she has never done before. I want to jump on a plane and go do it for her. I love her and I would prefer her to never struggle. Thankfully, she is just too far away for me to fly to her rescue. I say thankfully because if I could go there and do those things for her, than she would never learn and she would experience more pain in the long run, when I wasn’t around to “save” her. She has already learned to do things like cooking, cleaning, laundry, the transportation system, the campus, and many others. The difficulty is not doing these things but balancing all these things into what is a very difficult academic schedule. Most people say things like, “that is so great, you are teaching her to be independent and a lot of parents don’t have the courage to do that. In the end she will be so much stronger. It’s good to struggle, that’s how we learn. She will be able to handle anything life throws her way after this.”

God sent us all away to college many years ago.

“It is so great that he is teaching us to be independent a lot of parents wouldn’t have the courage to do that.”
“In the end we will be so much stronger”
“It’s good to struggle that’s how we learn”
“You will be able to handle anything life throws your way”

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

I Am Angry

I am Angry

How did I get Angry
Why do we get Angry?
What makes us hold on to Anger?
Is Anger worth my while?
What positive results have come from Anger?
Is Anger about being right?
Is anger a good investment?
How long does Anger last?
What makes Anger go away?
What is the immediate state that follows Anger?

Never mind, I am not Angry anymore

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Movie Time

Movie Time

I have heard people say, “life is like a movie and we are all playing our different parts.” Well, what’s the one thing that can make a good movie bad or a bad movie good? The answer is, your expectations. Your expectations can be so high that no movie could ever meet them. Just the same, they can be so low that the movie you thought you would hate, turns out to be not that bad. How can a movie live up to standing in line all night after waiting months for the premier to come out? How can a sequel meet the high standards set by the first blockbuster? However similar, every movie should have its own unique experience and be judged as such but because of the past, we create new standards and they tend to be higher.
So if life is like a movie, it would only come to reason that our everyday expectations have the same effect on our “movie experience”. Last year’s Disney trip with the kids, may have been the best ever but it doesn’t mean this year’s will be identical. Every experience is different and will stand out as its own. Don’t stand in that mental line for hours preparing yourself for what you expect to happen only to be disappointed later. As we experience life the things around us are constantly changing, particularly us. It would be impossible for things to happen just as we had expected. Even our perception as to what is happening can be influenced by so many factors that it’s hard to pin point why one day we enjoy something and the next day we don’t. The one thing I know is that the higher your expectations, the more likely you won’t like the movie. The lower your expectations the more likely it turns out to be not that bad. It’s not to say you should walk around without or with low expectations, just that they should be reasonable.

So, sit back, relax, and enjoy the movie. It will be over before you know it.